Guess who's back with a brand new rap.

:D

Today was fucking awesome.

I had :O 100c. yes. 2 apples.

hehe, wow it feels amazing. I have control FINALLY:)

Keep this up and I'll be the belle of the ball.. well dance..

well I won't but yeah, I'll be better than what I am now.

I jogged for 20 mins and now I'm going for a bike ride. Sit ups later!

I have to admit, its pretty easy when you're in a happy mood.

So everyone, BE HAPPY :)

Everything fits in place and nothing can bring you down.

I don't like Limbo.

I feel I'm stuck in limbo.

I haven't lost and I haven't gained. I hate not seeing results.

I'm usually patient but these days I get irritated easily and I would like to see even the slightest change. Anything that will let me know that my efforts are paying off.

I don't know if anyone has ever felt like that. I don't know what to do. How do I get out of limbo?

What do I need to do to see major changes?

I'm writing weird today. I lack sleep and I'm irritated.

No, I'm not on my period. I'm frustrated with my body and the way I look.

I feel like crawling into a dark corner for a month. No Food. No Contact with anyone. Nothing.

Just me and my fat. Let it waste away as I starve.

I found one good way to help me get closer to my goal weights.

Goal Weight Rewards.

Genius.

I've decided to do the same :)

Some are a bit strange, but hey, I never said I was normal :D

Too many thoughts in my head.

And lastly. I have 11 followers :)

I get all WOOP everytime I see a new person has clicked Follow.

Thank you all for following me.

Thank you especially to the wonderful PollyDolly for mentioning me.

My first follower, and first blog I followed.

:)

I ♥ green tea

Green Tea is the first drink that has had a soothing effect on me :)

Just a warning, this post is a rant about my weird love life so if you don't want to know,

I suggest you stop reading.....

Now :)

Ok, complicated shit I guess. A guy asked me to the dance, and I said yes because he's really sweet. No, he is not the guy I like, in fact no one knows I like him. Today, my best friend tells me she is falling for the guy I like and she asked him to the dance.

He said Yes.

I am both happy and pissed with her. Happy, because you should have seen her face, I swear, it literally glowed the rest of the day she was so thrilled. Pissed, well obvious, I like him.

All day I've been on and off about going.

I will go, but I can't face them. I'll avoid him all night if possible.

The first thing she said was, I touched his arm and wow it was amazingly muscular.

I fell for those same arms and I knew how she felt but I had to pretend like I had no idea.

She went on about his eyes and his smile.

The very same eyes and smile that makes me literally melt inside.

His accent and voice, French but rough because of all the cigarettes hes smoked. How it goes lower and softer when he gets closer to your face.

Oh how his laugh is infectious.

His kindness and gentlemanly manners are rare.

How he gently praises everything you do.

His protective nature makes you feel secure and happy.

His jokes are amazingly funny.

His innocence when it comes to sex yet his guilt when it comes to drug abuse and law.

He knows how to care for a girl.

You may say oh its nothing big. This is the first time I've fallen for a guy after a catastrophic break up with my ex. That was a year ago. Its a big deal to me.

The thing I get out of all this? I'm not in the mood to eat.

Je t'aime.

It looks so easy when you're on the other side, but its never easy when you try.

This picture portrays pretty much everything I want.

I want to be as thin as the girl sitting on the car.

I want a black Ford Mustang 1969 Fastback.

I want to be the cool thin girl that everyone likes.

I want to be able to walk into a room and have a certain presence that leaves everyone in awe.

Sure it comes with attitude, but it also comes with looks.

Call me vain if you will.

I have had enough of not being noticed, of being considered inferior,

of people not giving me the chance to show them what I'm like. Lets be honest,

people do judge strangers by what they look like. The first impression determines whether or not you want to get involved.

I know you are seeing a lot of I wants, but I promise I will deliver. I need to build up determination and motivation. Not that I don't have any, but if I want to see results fast, I'm going to have to push myself.

And I will.

Down side, I did binge today. I've had around 800c. :/ Not Good.

I'll liquid fast tomorrow. I'm going out Saturday evening so, all day Saturday, No Food.

Sunday is Fast Day. :)

The most gratifying achievement is to be who we want to be.

The Elasticity Theory.

The Elasticity Theory, I made it sound a little more sciencey and grand than it really is.

This theory was designed to help stop binging.

By wearing an elastic band around your wrist and snapping it against your skin, every time

you feel the urge to binge, should act as a distraction, or a method for teaching oneself not to binge. Either way it stops you from putting food in your mouth :)

Side Effects - soreness and redness where band has been snapped.

Beware - elastic band may break,have a few spare.

I do not own this theory, it is simply a message I am passing on :)

Oh my, prom is coming up. Well, in all honesty its a dinner. Theres no dancing, just a sit down meal. However, I am required to go with a guy, or I won't be allowed in.

I hate this. I want one guy only to ask me, but it seems that he won't. :/

Two guys have asked me already and I turned them down because I want this guy to ask me. I'm seeing him on the weekend, maybe he'll ask me then?

I can't say no to one more guy, I'm going to look like a right bitch.

I've decided, if he doesn't ask me, I won't go. I'll end up obsessing over him all night and it would be shitty.

I'll weigh in tomorrow. I'm curious to see if I have lost weight. I certainly feel less gonflé.

I'm sorta scared though. Aw well, whatever the weight...enfin I got nothing, I better be down!

I feel I'm forgetting to post something, or I'm simply not posting enough. Bon, when I figure it out, I'll let you know :)

Stay Strong, Think Thin xx

I think I have found my new religion :)

I dream that one day I'll be that skinny and have a sexy tattoo

The Liquid Fast.

I think I'm in love with it :) It went wonderfully well today, I drank so much water that I wasn't hungry at all. I'm going to keep this up for as long as possible!

Hehe, I am so happy I found something that works for me :)

Sundays are fast days, no doubt about that. Possibly Wednesdays as well, I won't rush into fasting though. I know how I work and if I don't build up, I will end up binging BIG TIME.

I have to up the exercise! Theres no way I'll weigh less in 5 weeks if I don't put my

all in when it comes to being active. I can do sit ups every day, dance around for an hour or so,

I don't live in a safe enough area to jog around on my own, which sucks.

Only a small post today, but school work calls!

Adieu.

On dit que mon obsession me hante.

I stuck to 700c. I know its a lot but I would have fainted otherwise =/

I've decided to liquid fast tomorrow.

Allowance -

2 cups of green tea

1 orange juice- 111c

1 yop- 150c

as much water as I like :)

I may sneak in a lollipop if I feel weak

I need to sleep well tonight. Had a weird ass sleep last night O.o

I want long hair :) So I am growing my hair nice and long.. have to get rid of these fugly layers.

I have that type of hair that flicks out T.T My hair is wavy so if I let it grow long,

and get rid of my layers it should look decent :)

Right I have 24lbs to lose before August! Doesn't sound impossible :)

Well I have to lose at least 5lbs in the next 5 weeks, which is possible. Maybe even more?

Lets not get hopes up to high, I've done that too many times only to be let down.

I have to do this though!

I hate my rolls of fat.

I hate the fact that my thighs touch. Ugh, disgusting.

I hate that my arms are fat.

I hate having a chubby face.

Basically, I hate the unnecessary fat that clings and won't fuck off.

I WILL BE SKINNY.